About Fear

     Fear is part of our lives but it doesn't have to overcome us so that it guides our behaviors and actions.  I am going to bring in my own example on this because it is what I am experiencing right now.  I had a fear of breast cancer since my mother died from it before she turned fifty.  My fears were realized when I was diagnosed two years ago. 
     There is a long psychological and emotional process, one of which I am still experiencing.  At first, your fears turn into resignation - just do what needs to be done to save my life.  Then, you want to just hide and ignore the subject, not even wanting to be around others who suffer from the same fate.
     I joined Livestrong( http://www.livestrong.org/) for my own physical recovery.  Little did I know that it would help me to open up.  My feelings and fear were just under the surface, but I denied it.  Eventually, I opened up more and accepted my experience.  Interestingly, as I faced it, I was better able to accept and be compassionate to others. 
     I recently read an article in the September 2015 Ensign magazine ( https://www.lds.org/ensign?lang=eng ) that described what I was feeling.  It was entitled, "Don't Run Away", by Jennifer Fallon.
     My biggest fears included leaving my husband alone, leaving my children and grandchildren and leaving without completing what Heavenly Father has for me to do!  You never give up your roles as wife and mother.  Even when your children are grown and you have grandchildren, you "fill in gaps" and are an example.  My perception is that they need me still and always will.  I have found this to be true as I think of my mother and how I would love to get her advice and understanding. 
     As the article describes a young woman who lives with the fear of dying from a heart condition, it reassures the reader through her realization that she can't keep running away from her fear and that the love of God can overpower even our darkest fears. 
     I am grateful for every day.  My focus has changed from two years ago to spotlight the most important people and missions I feel I must complete before I ever leave this earth.  However, that can be a fear too. 
     I must quote from the article, Fallon (2015) "...I often agonized that I didn't have enough faith to fulfill my "labor" during what I assumed would be my limited life span....I was so worried about disappointing Heavenly Father" (p. 20)
     This scripture helped the author of the article, Jennifer Fallon, and me:
"Thy Days are known, and thy years shall not be numbered less; therefore, fear not...., for God shall be with you forever and ever" (Doctrine and Covenants 122:9)
   To quote Jennifer further, "...a line from the Bible Dictionary inspired me.  It suggested that my fear was "unworthy of a child of God."1  Through the scriptures I also learned that "God hath not given us the spirit of fear" (2 Timothy 1:7) and that "perfect love casteth out fear (1 John 4:18).  These teachings became very real to me....I learned to identify the source of my fear, and I knew that I wanted to choose to follow Christ instead of coddle my anxiety." (p. 21)
   I liked "coddle my anxiety".  We do tend to hang on to our insecurities like a baby blankie.  It is comfortable and familiar.  We don't have to put the blankie down and face our fears, just hold it close and everything will be alright, but it isn't alright.  We are not getting up and moving forward.  We are not completing those things that we fear will be undone if we leave!
     Our struggle with fears will be ongoing, but we know what to do.  Take comfort in knowing that God knows when our time is done here.  Fear is not a characteristic of His disciples.  We will never get everything done, there is always something.  It is better that we focus on what we are doing presently and if it is on the right track. 
     Be cognizant of your fears, try to redirect them to changes in behavior and outlook.